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Area: Nurturing |
Topic:
Who Are You? |
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Article : Me
Pregnant? 10/26/00 |
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Underwritten
by ______
(Would you like to have your company, organization or
your name listed here?) |
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A word from Gary:
In my work as a hospice volunteer, I
have had the special opportunity to meet some of the most giving and
loving people. Among these people are the professional
caregivers. I am continually amazed by their dedication to their
work and their sense of responsibility to their patients.
One of these professionals is Dee
Nufe. In this contribution to The Caregiver Companion, she
describes her approach to her work and the joys she receives from her
patients.
You can share your responses with Dee
at: nufe@iserv.net
If you are a professional caregiver,
we would love to have you SUBMIT
your story.
I am often asked, "Why of all
things, would you choose to be a professional caregiver?". My usual
response is that it makes me feel good to ease life for others, especially
those who are no longer able to care for themselves.
Then, the questioner usually continues
with, "But isn't it depressing"? I respond by adding
that it is quite similar to raising a small child. There are pieces of
the job that aren't fun, but there are also those frequent special moments
when the unusual occurs, and you find that piece of joy and perhaps a little
laughter with that person you are caring for.
You probably remember Art Linkletter,
and the children he interviewed. He called that portion of the program
"Kids Say the Darnedest Things". Often, the audience would be
in hysterics over how those kids responded to his questions.
Dee & her Special
Friend, "M" |
Working with my patients, especially
those with some form of dementia, often provides me with similar enjoyable
opportunities. One of my favorite humorous stories comes from my sharing
with "M", an elderly Alzheimer's patient.
I had been caring for "M" for
about six months and we had grown quite close and fond of each other. We
loved to go for walks. So daily, we would venture out to explore the
changes in the neighborhood.
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Dee & "M" sharing some of their fun
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One day as we began our excursion, I
noticed that "M" seemed very puzzled, and I asked her if there was
anything she would like to share with me.
She replied, "I have a
dilemma". Now, I was aware that for the past few days, she had been
quite focused on and convinced that another couple was living with her and her
husband. So I figured this was what was concerning her and I asked her
if she would like to share that dilemma with me.
As we walked, she told me of her extreme
concern for this other couple she perceived as living with her. They
were just married and wanted to have a child, but the woman was unable to
become pregnant.
Then, "M" stopped walking, and
there was this long pause. She wasn't looking at the neighbor's flowers,
her usual occupation at this point in our walk. Instead she was becoming
even more agitated and troubled.
I then asked Mary why this was bothering
her so much, not knowing her dilemma involved me. After several attempts
to start her sentence, "M" finally blurted out her situation.
She didn't know how to ask me if I would be willing to have a child for
the couple.
Needless to say, I found myself quite
surprised and very unprepared by the nature of the request given I have a 27
year old son and have passed the birthing years of my life. I chuckled
inside myself but outwardly remained loyal to the very "real"
concerns of my friend, not wanted to take anything away from her experience.
At a loss for words, and a more
appropriate response, all I could say was, " I needed to discuss this
with my Pappy (husband)". I figured that would be enough to satisfy
"M" for the time being. It would also give me time to think of
a better response should the subject come up again in the future.
That evening, when Pappy and I sat down
to enjoy our dinner, I shared the results of my day with "M".
He was well aware of the potential for interesting events in my day as both of
his parents had also been Alzheimer's patients. So he eagerly awaited
this latest installment in my life with "M".
I felt a rather large grin occurring on
my face as I told him the story of "M"'s request. Pappy's
response was a very quick and amused, "I don't think so, Honey", and
we finished the dinner chuckling over the prospects of such an event taking
place at this point in our lives.
Fortunately for me, "M" never
again bought up the subject of me having a child for this couple.
However, I do feel very fortunate and honored to have had such a deep
friendship with "M" that she felt she could ask such an important
request of me.
Her concern for the welfare of this
childless couple was just one more reflection of "M"'s lifelong
caring nature. She had always been willing to do whatever she could for
someone else. This story (while being an extremely humorous experience
for me) was just one more example of her wonderful desire to take care of and
give to others which has occupied most of her life. I only hope that
some day, I may become as giving as "M".
SEND
this article to a friend!
Dee shared this recent
piece of her creativity with
us regarding her feelings
and perceptions of "M".
She is such a lady
So soft and so sweet,
Words can’t explain
How I feel when we meet.
Her voice is but a whisper
But so sweet and so kind.
I love her with all my heart
I can’t begin to imagine us apart.
We may not be the same tomorrow,
As we were a year ago.
For you see my little Lady has Alzheimer’s
The robbery of the mind, and for us such sorrow.
There is still a person inside that little body
That loves and laughs and cares a lot,
If you ever got the chance to meet her
She also would touch your heart, right on the spot.
I am here for you my little Lady
Whatever you may need,
Please ask it of me
It is my pleasure, whatever your plea.
So I will end this with
What an honor
To know my little Sweet Pea.
To laugh, to love
My little Sweet Pea,
an Angel from above.
You can email Dee at:
nufe@iserv.net
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This page is
underwritten by ___________
(Would you like to have your company, organization or your
name listed here?)
|
Other
WHO ARE WE articles:
Articles 1:
OUR
STORY, K. Johnson, family caregiver 08/21/00 (4 min)
Articles 3:
DREAMS DO COME TRUE,
D.
Ellsworth, caregiver recipient 09/05/00 (4 min.)
MEMORIES
OF HOME, D. Ellsworth, caregiver recipient
09/05/00 (1 min)
MY
FAITHFUL HUSBAND, D. Ellsworth, caregiver recipient
09/05/00 (1 min.)
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